ACTION STORY! (hehe) enjoy.

(action/American comedy style comedy… mm judge for yourself.)

Kage and akira are sitting peacefully in a wooden shack in the town of small will.

Akira: Yo kage hows it hangin’?

Kage: Lower than yours, thanks

Akira: scuse me?

Kage: well what I heard from pai your not exactly a big boy

Akira: get stuffed. I fully satisfied her with my big boy... ness.

Kage: indeed.

Akira: so how are you?

Kage: am good.

Akira: good good.

Kage: … is that it?

Akira: yeah.

Kage: still annoyed at brad for stealing pai from your hands?

Akira: … … ……

Kage: ah well. Never mind, there’s always Aoi.

Akira: what? She looks like a man with her new “look at my new final tuned hairpieceâ€Â

Kage: I think it’s very nice actually.

Akira: well you obviously have incredibly bad taste, or are gay.

Kage: well at least I have a decent sized shlong. Little man.

Akira: go fiddle with your throwing knives.

Kage: bigger than your co…

<akria slaps kage in his cheek, thus causing him to stagger back knocking over shun d’s pots and pans, aswel as his drinks>

Akira: ENOUGH

<Kage’s hatred is growing as he stares into akiras fiery eyes>

Kage: NEVER SLAP ME AGAIN YOU SMALL …

<Akira grabs Kage by the throat>

Akira: ENOUGH TALK OF MY SHLONG

Kage: you’re breath is vile. Try avoiding eating too much cheese…

<Akira slaps Kage>

Akira: I SAID ENOUGH TALK OF MY SHLONG

<Kage bursts out into hysterical laughter>

<Akira goes bright red with embarrassment>

(Voice from outside) “Akira is a small boy!â€Â

<Akira drops Kage, and rushes to the door>

Akira: LEAVE ME ALONE

< Aoi is sat in Jacky’s convertible BMW with Jacky sat suspiciously smiling>

Jacky: I’ve done hand-cuffed lightning!

Aoi: random.

Akira: shut the hell up you really do suck. Nor do you make sense.

Jacky: I’ve done hand-cuffed l…

Aoi: quiet Hun.

Akira: Aoi did you imply, a mere few seconds ago… that I had a small member?

Aoi: yeah why.

Akira: ‘cause it’s getting on my tits, stop saying I have a small member.

Aoi: what u gonna do about it?

<Jacky leans over and glares in Akiras face>

Akira: your car sucks.

<Akira spits on Jacky’s car>

Jacky: you hoe! Wait there till I getcha!

<Akira motions for Jacky to “bring itâ€Â>

Akira: come on you mo-fo

Aoi: stop!

Akira: Shut it you tart

<aoi steps out of the car and slaps akira>

(A voice can be heard from across the road, in the shadows)

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!â€Â

<Sarah Bryant steps out of the shadows>

<There is a minute’s silence with Jacky glaring at Sarah, and akira glaring into aoi’s eyes. >

Kage: NAMU

Aoi: what the hell?

<Kage steps out with shun di, both clutching bottles of Budweiser>

Kage: si! Small will! <Hiccup> namu.

Shun di: beers all round.

<Akira grabs the nearest bottle, smashes it, then in an instant pierces Jacky’s front tyre>

<Aoi and jacky are gob smacked>

Jacky: FAG!

<Shun di withdraws a cigarette and throws it, though it fails to land as Kage maru throws a kunai at it, cutting it in two.>

Shun di: why?

Kage maru: pssh. Fags are BAD

Shun di: so is drinking… <hic> alcohol <motions to Kage maru’s Budweiser>

<Kage crushes the bottle in his hand, then looks up to see jacky and akira fighting on top of the car, and aoi and Sarah having a bitch- slap.>

Shun di: its times like these I wish I was in the pub pissed.

Kage: good idea. Lets drink poisonous bud.. weis… er!

Shun: WAZAAAAAAAAP

<Kage and shun di remove themselves from the fighting area and enter the forbidden flagship pub>

<Akira and jacky are trapped beneath the car as jeffry lifts the bmw with his immense strength>

Jeffry: hey hey, cmon.

Wolf: am coman am coman.

<aoi and Sarah run to the car to see if all is well>

Jeffry: car. Lift.

Wolf: go back to school. That’s not heavy.

<They both haul the car to one side and see akira and jacky still fighting>

Sarah: A TRUCK! LOOK OUT!

Jeffry: TWO TRUCKS.

<brad burns can be seen driving one of the trucks, with goh hinogami in the other.>

Wolf: is it just me or do them trucks look like there gonna collide into us.

Jeffry: Your never gonna win, by that intellect.

Wolf: shaddap. Just come on.

<sarah and aoi drag akira and jacky to one side as jeffry and wolf run at the two trucks seen in the distance>

Brad: I sting like a bee, bite like a ti… WHAT THE?!?!

<jeffry can be seen propped against the truck, stalling it with his immense strength.>

Wolf: feel the real power.

<wolf is also holding the other truck>

Goh: out of the road! Hiaaaaah!

<goh steps out of the truck and kicks wolf, causing him to drop to the floor>

Wolf: m’lo!

Goh: Chamone!
<goh ruthlessly drives over wolf, but wolf is clinging onto the wheel, getting slightly dizzy as he is spun around.>

Jeffry: It seems to me, huahah. Im gonna get squashed by that truck!

Brad: Move, dumbass.

<the wheel on goh’s truck is suddenly flung off by wolf.>

Goh: noooooooooooooooooooo

<jacky stands up>

Jacky: ive done handcuffed light…

Sarah: not now jacky.

Wolf: <imitates wolf cry> suck on that goh!

<goh can be seen crashing into the forbidden flagship inn>

Brad: is that all u got? <revs engine> I was hoping youd be better than that!

<brads truck is suddenly on the road again as jeffry is now occupying himself in lau’s fishpond.>


Lau: Yo jeff.

Jeffry: thought you were incurably ill?

Lau: nah. That was a spin off, I dunno if im gonna bother going into final tuned.

Jeffry: why?

Lau: you know, they keep bringing out the same game with a slightly different addition. Theres gonna be too many at this rate.

Jeffry: sorted, cya later.

<brads truck can be seen ploughing his truck into the nearby houses.>

Brad: this is for you lei, ya slaphead.

<brad drives his truck straight at the church.>

Brad: muahhah… <his evil laugh is interrupted by lei’s fists!>

Lei: oi! Italian! I was praying, now bog off!

Brad: howd you get in?

Lei: ahhhhhhh teleported.

<brad indicates the open door>

Brad: really.

Lei: why don’t you drive your big truck into that river over there.

Brad: ok.

Lei: laters!

<brad does as he’s asked and jumps out of the truck as it plummets into the nearby river>

<lion can be seen skating along the road>

Lion: hey guys what happened?

Akira: nothing much, the usual.

<lion does a kickflip>

Lion: why am I so great!

Wolf: go back to school.

Lion: and what you gonna do? Hulk Hogan wannabe?

<wolf picks up lions board, breaking it over his head.>

Wolf: that.

<lion is now unconscious>

Jacky: nice one DUDE

Wolf: shut up.

<goh flies out of the pub and lands beside akira>

Goh: ryu.

Akira: mishima.

Kage: NAMU! Feel my wrath!

<bottle smashes>

Vanessa: OI! Come back here!

<shun di is moving down the road with incredible speed>

Pai: Kage your evil.

Kage: quiet! Get back to work.

Pai: I *was* at work until goh drove his wagon into the pub

Kage: not my problem. Make me a cup of herbal tea.

Pai: no bloody way! You idle male!

Kage: ohhhh namu. Ive upset the baby!

Pai: you calling me a baby?

Kage: nah im calling you a granny.

Pai: just as bad.

Kage: and?

Pai: go.. be a ninja.

<kage performes a ten foot toss on pai, followed by a floater combo.>

Kage: okies.

<pai is now knocked out>

Kage: oh dear.

Brad: everyone back to my house to watch some films.

<at 2:10 in the morning everyone is pissed and jeffry can be seen with lau sitting beside the fishpond. Vanessa is still chasing shun di, and kage is scaling the rooftops looking for bats. Hes had too many buds.>

My story ends. I hope you enjoyed it. Ill do another sometime… it depends on the feedback outcome.

Any ideas for the next?

 

Are you trying to write a script for a VF movie?

I hope not.... martial arts comedy just doesn't work...

Actually, that was just me trying to put things nicely. I simply wanted to say "wtf is this shit?"

 

Wtf?

 

[ QUOTE ]
Shadowfang said:

acky: I’ve done hand-cuffed lightning!

Aoi: random.

Akira: shut the hell up you really do suck. Nor do you make sense.

Jacky: I’ve done hand-cuffed l…

Aoi: quiet Hun.


[/ QUOTE ]

ROFL . I always love a good vf FANFIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

the storys not to be taken seriously, after all its just a bit of fun. also i wanted to prove that there is a slight humour content behind jacky's very... shallow intellect. /versus/images/graemlins/wink.gifit was completely random, i like creative writing. if you have any ideas for another just say, im always up to hear other peoples ideas! /versus/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

Please stop before you hurt someone. Or take it to Mediaminer.

 

Zerochan:
you are so cute, I would like to make sweet love to you.

 

That was fairly decent. Nice effort /versus/images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

SHADOWFANG THAT STORY WAS GREAT!!! please do us another, i cant wait to hear the next one!!!

gaming humour at its peak dude /versus/images/graemlins/grin.gif

i liked the bit where wolf snaps the skateboard over lions head ROFL

 

Thanks! what should the next one be like? i was thinking maybe a vampire or horror scene kinda thing

 

/versus/images/graemlins/frown.gif shame. i hope you guys would give me some idea of a next topic...
humerous/serious i do both.
but i need an idea of what to write...

 

Oy! Nutta!

You would think having the same photoshop effect over both the avatars would give you away. God wasn't kind when creating the mental aspect of all his children.

Well since this is so sad / fucked up here's a joke as comic relief:

This rich buisness guy crashed with his plane *does sound effect and shows with hands* in the middle of the desert and so he thinks, like, "Oh shit I'm fucked!" and panics. Well, once he gets his senses back he knows as he's the last survivior on the plane he has no chance but to try and get out of the desert and starts walking carrying his huge briefcase of money. Thirsty as fuck no doubt.

After a while he sees this camel shop right? So he goes in there yada yada "I want to buy a camel to get out of the desert!!!" + a nice cool drink of water (MMM!). Well he gets it - it costs all his money but he gets some water and a kinda crazy Camel mofo and knows he has to get to the nearest city to inform his office / family / whatnot that he's alive and get his ass asap back home.

The Camel guy explains that the camel itself responds to certain commands and goes over 'em:
'Phew!' means run.
'Yalla!' means run faster.
'Amen!' means stop.

So the guy gets up on his friendly but abit crazy camel and goes "Phew!" and the camel starts moving in the direction the shopkeeper said the city was. After being bored for abit he goes "Yalla Yalla!" and the camel speeds of - fast like oiled lightning but actually still stable.

The guy wakes up; he must have slumbered of in the heat and he sees the camel is running straight towards the edge of a cliff. He panics. He can't remember a single command for the life of him and starts crying and goes "Oh father ours in heaven,..." and then ends with "Amen!" and *car squeeling noise* the camel stops - just an inch from the edge of the cliff.
The guy thanks the heavens and takes out his handkerchief and whipes his forehead and says "Phew that was close!".


/KiwE (Why do easterbunnies REALLY need that good eyesight for huh?? Eating carrots like there's no tomorrow [well the myths have to be good cause I've never seen a bunny with glasses as of yet!]. Beware and walk home in packs of 3 atleast during all easter!!11!)

 

[ QUOTE ]
Myke said:

It's sad that you created an account (Darkk) just to reply to yourself.

If you can't handle criticism then don't publish your work.

Your story reads more like an irc log in a channel full of teenage American cosplayers. Some may find it funny though.

[/ QUOTE ]

*dies of laughter*

*Is revived* Its lameness is what made the story so funny cuz the VF characters are pretty lame in and of themeselves, except lion, he's got flare. Too bad he began talking to himself. We need a new punching bag around VFDC (ie not me) . Being new to the VFDC boards can take its toll on anyone.

*enter something about pads here*

 

I had a feeling that Shadowfang and Darkk were one in the same. Anyways the action story was ok I guess.

 

This story scares me. It's not too bad tho, if it's meant to be straight humorous

 

cheers, man. ive got some artwork you might like /versus/images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

This is good shit and basically u are an ass

 

wot the feck are u on??

 

Stop this nonsense. /versus/images/graemlins/grin.gif

...


and don't reply back to me, PLZ!! Its the least that you can do. /versus/images/graemlins/wink.gif